Yesterday I realized the significance and importance of declaring that I am a survivor and NOT a victim! During my therapy session, as I discussed the Sandusky case and how the news took me back to the time when I was abused, i struggled with finding a term to reference when discussing how I felt. During the exchange with my psychologist, I realized that the term survivor "feels" much better than the term victim.
I read @goldietaylor's posts over the last several days as she revealed that she had been sexually abused by a high school football coach. One of her tweets mentioned that she never wanted to be considered "a victim." I can totally relate because I feel the same way. Though its hard to explain, I don't consider myself a victim of child sex abuse. I do, however, consider myself a survivor. some may say its minor definition and meaning. I disagree.
There is something to be said about a "survivor" versus a "victim." I personally prefer the former. I at least gives me peace of mind knowing that I made it through and over that horrific time in my life. It allows me to express myself to others knowing they can survive such situations also. I hope the children involved in the current sex abuse cases realize they are survivors and that they are worthy of surviving. They have a story to tell as do many others who have experienced the same.
Have you or anyone you know been involved in a child abuse situation? If so, have you overcome the situation? How did you overcome? If not, what do you feel is holding you back from overcoming that situation?
Be Blessed,
DADT Story
2 comments:
I appreciate the use of the term survivor as opposed to victim! It enables us to take back some of the power in a situation that often leaves one feeling powerless and helpless. It can be an ongoing struggle, one you sometimes forget you're battling, but I've overcome by convincing myself that I did nothing wrong. I also had to forgive myself for doubting myself, blaming myself and for feeling ashamed. I still sometimes hide the experience for fear that I'll be viewed as dirty or used. I'm still working on it. It, like all things in life, takes prayer and help from God.
Thanks for your comment. :)
I appreciate the term survivor versus victim as well. It does in fact allow me to take some of the power back. It also gets me out of the mindset of feeling sorry for myself. That is not to say those feelings were not valid, it just makes me focus more on the positive rather than the negative situation that occurred so many years ago.
I hope you continue to progress with forgiving and blaming yourself. These are also, in my opinion, common opinions. Its unfortunate but true. The good thing is we realize it and move forward, furthering the goal of getting ALL the power back!
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